Scared Shitless

Well, I don't know how to find a picture for what I feel, but I am feeling this way.

Blogging down here is just so uninspiring. I have nothing to really branch out with, so I'm keeping my facebook to be my daily "micro-blog." I don't tweet. Twitter isn't doing it for me.

The miserable bastard who was letting me use his car is named Anthony Barcelona. He's 98, falling into dementia, and is a real arrogant bastard. I see there are visions of my former bosses popping up in the strangest places. Thank god(dess) I took abnormal psychology and decided to study psychopathy, sadism, serial killers, and malignant narcissists because Barcelona is one of them.

So, here's the deal. I am basically stuck here with mom, no regular job (unless I have a car and now I don't) and must deal with the stench of white, rich entitlement while I wait for NYC to get off its lazy ass, vote Cuomo in, and start saving everyone else from the pit of hell.

Blorange and her husband have been letting me stay when I visit my pain and osteo specialists (god, I love their kids!) and as for Con Ed? Who knows. I still have scores for 4 more years, but more people are going to have to retire and I'm going to have to fight and beg some union to let me in. I truly have given up working for an office and other than the lottery? I don't know where money is going to come in.

In the meantime, I'm having the time of my LIFE watching the Tea Party idiots bang their heads against a wall. They are worse than Jehovah's Witnesses trying to recruit me. Who the hell is watching out for my best interests? Not these twits. They think Sarah Palin is coherent, Sharron Angle is kind and christian, and these working-class morons are ruining the party for everyone else.

Obama, you've really blown it. In your quest for bipartisanship? You're going to be the next Jimmy Carter. And look at his history. Quashed my Reagan. Seen as "nice" by history. Reagan did what Nixon had only started, which was take a complete enemies list and rig the system to completely destroy anyone and anything that got in his way. Women, children, gays, AIDS, the middle class, the working poor...you get the picture. Obama is selling the farm piece by piece by this useless clinging to bipartisanship. Ideals are as bad as the rampant ideology of Rand Paul, McCain, Boehner and the rest of the lunatic fringe. There is theory and then there is application. This country needs application. Not more theory.

I need application. Of strength, fortitude and for once in my goddamn unlucky life HONESTY. Wholehearted. Not p.c. bullshit, HONESTY. Not the Billy Joel song, just some straight-up bottom line This-is-how-we're-gonna-be HONESTY.

That's what I need, that's what I want. And I do know the difference between the two.

FL is a dumping ground. For drug deals, carjackers, crystal meth labs, Mickey Mouse and a whole bunch of racist republicans whose vision of life goes no further than, "Um, I got mine. You can choke and die." Once again, I thought a new place would bring me closer to reclaiming my humanity. But, oh, dear kiddies, I was WRONG. There is something with this country at this very moment. And it is not me, although I'm still supposed to believe that I am the problem.

I refuse to buy into this crap.

Election day can't come fast enough. Neither can the moment that I get the hell outta here.

Wow. That felt better.

The Most Perfect Sentiment....EVER

This says it all.

Summer is over, I'm still stuck in hell. More interviews, no jobs. They know Northeners (translation: yankee democrat liberal bastards) are smarter, demand benefits and pay, and won't put up with shit without someone from the labor board watching their back. Hey, it worked for me at AP re: my last paycheck and His Name We Abuse, so why would I give it up now?

I do, however, have a car to drive. I know I haven't blogged in a while, but fibro really kicked my ass these past 10 weeks. 98 degrees with 88% humidity means this here cat-lover (god, that was very "redneck" of me) must sit with legs up against wall while Dexter and Kashi stare with heads tilted. "What a funny two-legger," they must think.

More about Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin and the generalities (and vulgarities) of living in a red state. I've also registered as an independent because I've come to believe both parties are completely full of it. And I don't mean nationbuilding.

Hang onto your seatbelts, I'm baaaaack!!!