That's Just What I Thought...

Well, I’m loving a certain email that was suddenly deleted at my job. Scavullo gave me a copy. Very nice. More proof that I am not the only maverick that is SICK of this place.

More buyouts and We Don’t Need You Here Anymore decrees are rip-roaring through my company. The previous management was like the Clinton administration. This one’s like the Bush administration. Disengaged management, cover-ups, propaganda, and that rah rah cheerleading bullshit of We Are the Best! We Are Number One! which is a lie, but the emperors wear no clothes. In fact the workers in the clothing factory don’t even know how to sew, stitch, bind a hem, repair a zipper, or attach a button on a sleeve.

Ketchum decided to pass on my application, but I knew it wouldn’t work. I got a bad vibe from Jen Hoffman as I sat there last week. I am STILL not in the business of touchy-feely cozy-oochy coochy when it comes to job interviews, just the facts will do. I think the nail in my coffin came about when I mentioned Pinochet’s impending spawn and subsequent work-dump that will land on my desk and only then I saw Hoffman’s little belly. I think she might have taken it personally. I, myself, can’t account for the estrogen surge that might piss off a pregnant interviewer, I stuck to the facts. I knew instinctively that the interview (and Hoffman) had no focus and they wouldn’t take me. So, the letter I received last night was not surprising at all. “Though we find your background impressive, there is no place for you at this time.” Um, no. There are two places, Jenny! You don’t want to give me either one. Whatever…IMG called back and I’m going in Monday. All I know is there’s a place for me other than here.

I do not have to put up with 11-hour days, $30,000 positions with no healthcare, no communication, non-negotiable overtime, shitty commutes, mandatory ass-kissing, and powermongering. Since my hunt is about to hit the one-year mark, it’s very clear that I am still here in hell because I know I am worth more. My last hunt took 13 months, this one might take longer in this current climate. People are desperate to sell their souls. I am not. I will not. I do not. Ever. Should they fire me? Then my standards may have to change in order to survive. For now, I’m all they have. If I’m such a horrible worker, why am I still here….now that’s a question only THEY can answer, not that they would.

Scavullo’s email—and for the life of me, I don’t know why I was given a copy—is proof that personal standards and integrity count for something. If the person in this email won’t give up? Then I can’t either. Why are questions (not “dissent”) stifled? Just who the hell are we scaring so badly that a straight answer is not part of the equation? This Do-as-I-say bullshit has to end somewhere.

Let it continue with me. My dignity is not here to be bought and sold.