Come on, kiddies. Is anyone there really excited about this year's Oscars? I don't think so. Maybe FIVE people saw The Aviator? And Leo didn't even play him suffering through psychotic hand-washing and OCD fear of germs. Howard Hughes went batshit, why don't they show that part of it? Oh, that's right--no one wants to do a product placement for Ivory soap with a bugged-eyed agoraphobic nutcase. The costumes aren't "flashy" enough.
Sorry to sound so cynical, but we can't even count on a crappy Randy Neuman song this year from Disney's perennial Pool of Cartoon Song Talent. Hell, Elton John and Lions won't even be on the stage!!! Booooring. What's even up for best song? Do we care?
Clint's going to take it all again. And as for Hilary Swank, I had a massive crush on her hubby Chad Lowe that lasted from about 1984-1987, so my money's on her. She's about the only woman I'd accept him marrying, since it obviously wasn't me, so I will be glad to watch her cavort in yet another stunning Calvin Klein gown and walk off with Oscar #2.
The one thing I will look forward to is Joan Rivers ripping people to shreds on the TV Guide channel. Turns out Page Six had a lovely gossip item about how E channel is getting sick of Star Jones's constant reminders of her freebie wedding, and that's a no-no. What does a black tie event have to do with her October 2004 wedding? Time moves forward, Star. Get off it, will ya?
But that's the only good thing on tv tonight, so I will be a dork and watch.
This early Grammys and Oscars thing isn't nice, though. March just seems so empty.
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