Even Evil Has Its Limits!

Well, current sources say that the former person who made my life a forked-tongue-two-face HELL from that place is leaving her post today. You know THAT PLACE? The one that used to be an ice rink on 33rd? Like a good (former) journalist, I will not reveal my sources. But the call came. And it made me happy. Today is the Forked-Tongue's LAST DAY.

Now, you may ask why is there a really bad picture of Eva Longoria attached to this post? Eva is beautiful. Eva also shares my birthday (we're four years apart, exactly.) This photo is here because of a very private (and TRUE) joke that I, and so many of my former journalist/ice rink colleagues share: we all agree that Fork Tongue reminds us of The Ugly Version of Eva Longoria. Shorten that phrase to EVIL Longoria, and you've got the name we gave her.

Ms. Longoria is known for flawless makeup, cute outfits and sparkly eyes. EVIL Longoria is known for buck teeth, blotchy skin, peroxided hair and telling you what you want to hear while she lies to management to save her own ass while putting your's on the block at the lowest price. In fact, this photo here STILL makes the real Ms. Longoria beautiful. EVIL could eat an apple thru a fence with that overbite. This was the same person (Evil, not Eva) that looked me in the eye and asked about my "health and well-being" while going to Bassett Hound with everything I said back on October 10, 2006 (my dad's birthday--Ooooh I wish he were alive, whatta phone call THAT woulda been!) and basically sold me out. What made this whole incident particularly galling was 1) Evil suffers from the same host of physical maladies that I've survived; and 2) never told the powers that be that I needed a good rest, not a shove out the door. It's all in the wording. I know this because OOPS! I'm the journalist. She's the evil HR rep. And now, her time has come.

My sources were happy to let me know that after all the suffering I went thru? Some of these people are OUT the door. I guess they have no one else to abuse and now the abuse is turning on them?

Karma's a motherfucker, kiddies. Let's see how her new place treats EVIL.

And Eva? I love ya, babe. Happy Birthday to You...um, Me...umm....US!