See? I'm not crazy. Or, maybe I am. Right now.

Well, Ellie told me nothing I didn't already know. My energy is insane. Emotionally, I'm imbalanced--gee, tell me something I don't know--and she suggested me taking a medical leave of absence. Something I've fiddled with in my mind. Again and again. I am in pain, physically and emotionally. My next step is either a psychiatrist (fuck you, Tom Cruise) or a hospital (I like jello.)

My increasing swings from anger to apathy and to rage will eventually land me in a "facility". My mother had a nervous breakdown from one of her jobs and my dad had two. She also mentioned that my latent psychic ability came from my mother AND father. I always thought he had something the alcohol couldn't kill. I will not escape my own destruction by ignoring what's going on. It's more than the negativity of my job, it's all that I've absorbed so far in my whacked out 34 years. Here's an excerpt from one of her blogs on metaphysics. It's frighteningly relevant to my life.


All species - plant, animal, human - are highly adaptable. The basic systems of life, given some minimal parameters, is able to adjust and survive. As Earth's energy cells continue through this change, individuals will be affected in different ways. If you are in a state of balance--meaning that you are working on your life's path, moving forward with little steps that hopefully lead to larger steps - then the conversion, and the ability of your body to change, needn't be that difficult. Everyone will be aware of it to some degree. Electrical sensations in the body will be detectable, even in the most balanced person.

Those that are having difficulty in life, however, will need to look at the relationship between themselves and everything else in their lives. Stress is one of the things that is going to throw the body's central electrical system even further off-course during these changes. The whole immune system goes right down, because the body needs to adapt to these new grid levels---so it can pull energy from the new pattern. A stressed person won't be able to put the proper internal energy into maing the shift.

So the new energy will be all around, but the stressed body won't be compatible to receive that energy. Imagine the new cells all emitting energy - the next step for us is to prepare to access the new energy by attuning to it now. This is important for good health in the future.

Illnesses that are grid-induced will always be electrical in nature - headaches, fatigue, memory loss, disorientation, feelings of agitation, vision difficulties, and ringing in the ears. many of these symptoms may be the result of living in an old cell that is dying while engaged in a lifestyle that is unhealthy or unbalanced. Most of these conditions can be traced back to a basic imbalance of electrical forces in the body due primarily to negative thoughts and stress.

If you are feeling stuck - and not moving forward on the truths you seek here on earth then you are under stress. This leads to overload and illness. More and more people are showing evidence of being out of balance. More is written about mental illness such as depression these days. Some people are acting violent or erratic for no apparent reason. The energy grid doesnot cause mental illness. What happens is that the new energy pattern is still grounded in the etheric realm.

It is fluctuating a lot--solar flares, disruptions at the Earth's core, and planetary alignments all influence it-- causing the grid to through up spikes. It's like lightening coming out of the cells. When a cell experiences one of these energy spikes the whole cell actually becomes electrically charged and the sub-cell gets agitated.

Their charge level actually increases, which forces a higher charge level in all animals, all plants, and all people within the cell. So now you are taking in Earth force energy at a higher level at a higher frequency.

Most people are taking in pretty low Earth energy, and solar energy, due to a significant amount of stress.

In a state of balance you can tap into higher psychic abilities. What we think we shall become. Listen to your intuition (little voice).

Something to think about. Consistently in my case. Yikes.